A Year Ago Today

This is a long one, you guys, and a different one, but I need to tell it. And I need to start off with a story.

In 2014, I was working at a job I hated. I was applying to anywhere and everywhere else. I wasn’t even picky anymore, as long as it got me out. Enter Roots Coffeehouse. I had visited Roots opening week, and the moment I walked in I thought to myself, “I want to work here.” I hadn’t even had the coffee yet, but there was just something about this place, I could feel it. Then I had the coffee and I was done. A year and a half went by. I moved further away and couldn’t go as much. But one day, they were hiring again. I knew I couldn’t afford to work there, but wanting to have my own shop one day, I knew I’d need to work in one at some point. Though I didn’t go nearly as often, Roots had continued to be a place I loved and the idea of working there still made something in my heart skip a beat. So I thought, “what have I got to lose” and sent in my resume. I interviewed that week and hoped for the best.

That weekend my church had a conference that I was supposed to go to with several friends, but they all had to cancel last minute. I wound up running into the owners of Roots and they invited me to sit with them throughout the conference. Even from the beginning they were always so gracious like that. I got a call the next afternoon: “So…wanna work at Roots?” Oh, I’m sure it was more official than that, but I only remember trying not to pee my pants and having a dance party with my best friend when I hung up the phone.

Almost no one thought it was a good idea. Why would I leave this great, salary position I had to make an hourly wage that was a fraction of my current income? Even I had to admit that financially, it didn’t make sense. But it seemed like everything I wanted, and so without any real hesitation, I accepted the job.

It felt like free-falling. I knew it would be hard to pay bills, but I saw the Lord’s hand all over it. I was plunging 1,000 feet per second, but it was exciting and I had the calming sense that the Lord’s hand was ready to catch me at the bottom. I had total peace. But I had no idea what I was getting into. I was not ready for how I would be grown, and stretched, and shaped and loved.

I have worked at Roots Coffeehouse exactly one year today, and I could not be more thankful. I immediately felt welcomed by this team, although my own insecurities tried to convince me otherwise for a good while. Most of them had no idea that I battled with feeling like I don’t belong. Fearing that I would never really be part of the team. And yet even not knowing, they all had a part in fighting that lie back. Everyone was not only nice, but so encouraging and inclusive. In small ways and big ones, every one of them made me feel seen and loved and wanted. These were not coworkers. They were a family, and somehow, I had been adopted in.

When I started at Roots, I knew nothing about coffee, and I knew that. For crying out loud, I had a gold card at the Other Place, and my favorite drink was a Caramel Macchiato. But I wanted to learn, and I have been patiently taught so much here. There is no end to the wealth of knowledge, and they don’t hold it closely to their chests; they give it out freely and humbly. This family cares about me and my dreams and wants to see me achieve them. They are patient with me while I get there and encouraging when I get frustrated with how slowly improvement and change comes.

And in regards to change, so much of that has happened here. In this place, I have grown more into who I really am. Which has that disgustingly cheesy ring to it, but it’s true. I’ve said it so many times in the last several months, “I’m more me than I’ve ever been.” All my life I’ve been trying on other people’s styles and habits, and they never fit exactly right, though some came close. But here, I’ve developed more of my own habits and opinions, and styles, and they fit perfectly. These friends let me be me, and I’m more confident in who I am, or rather, more confident that this is who Jesus made me to be. I am stronger and more dependent on him, and just more….me. I don’t know how else to say it. And the Lord has used this place and these people to do it. To make me brave. To make me sure.

These people have given me good music, good laughs, good tears, good words. They have opened their homes to me. They are incredible. And each one of them has been a part of shaping me this last year. Each of them reflect Jesus so well in their own individual ways. J and Melanie in their love, leadership, and generosity. Ben in his patient teaching and desire for growth. Chandler in her compassion. Ryan in his servant’s heart. Sole in her genuineness. Brandon in his care for others. Jay in his desire to serve well and in his humility. Clint in his desire to see the good in everyone. Ceilidh in her inclusivity. Chase in his supportiveness. Justina in her heart to protect and lead. Jesse in his encouragement. Steven in his stewardship and pursuit of excellence. All of them have pointed me to Jesus in their own way, but mostly through the way they have loved me like He does.

And it’s not just the people I work with, it’s so many of the people I serve. We like to call them honorary roots family members. They invest in us, and we in them. I’m telling you...this place? It’s just special.

In this last year, while I’ve been nomading, an unexpected home appeared. It’s not a place to sleep, although some have been known to do so. It’s no place to live, but I am watching much of my life unfolding there regardless. It is a sanctuary. A space. A place where I am loved and encouraged and built up. A place where I am taught. A place where it is safe for me to have good days and bad days and be exactly who I am. A place with good conversation and great coffee. Where the people love Jesus and others well, and me more than I could possibly deserve. A place I have cried on occasion, and laughed often. A place I want to protect, and serve, and love, and stay.

This place has never just been about coffee. It’s about the people. The people that grow the coffee, roast the coffee, brew the coffee, and the people that drink the coffee. The atmosphere here is different, and people often remark on how calming and inviting it is. I don’t know what to tell people other than that there’s a whole lot of Jesus in the people here. And I’m grateful.